Impressions: Drunken Robot Pornography

Drunken Robot Pornography is an FPS/bullet hell mash-up in which you wear a jetpack and shoot a whole load of robots, while your own robo-suit makes a whole load of quips. It’s out now, and I played a bit of it earlier.

Was that giant mecha-octopus-thing wearing a top hat? Maybe I imagined it. Everything moves so fast, it’s gone (i.e. dead, or has deaded me) before I get a chance to look at it. It’s like a canal ride by speedboat. “Was that a duckling? Wait, did we just pass a castle? Is this Manchester already? Oh God, watch out for that…” .

Only with a jetpack rather than a boat. And in the future rather than on a quiet waterway. And with huge, deadly, robots rather than ducks and Manchester. Er. Okay, look, Dejobaan’s Drunken Robot Pornography is a first-person bullethellish shmup that throws more at the screen than there’s possibly time to see, and tries extremely hard – too hard, perhaps – to be funny. Oh bollocks, I think I’ve just written my conclusion right at the start of this piece.

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